just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize