Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Randomize
