Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Randomize
