How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Randomize
