We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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