I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I am one with the molecules
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
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