You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
