This is not my ceiling
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
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