what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Randomize
