After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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