i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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