What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize