we made out on top of his cat.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
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