Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Your shirt... Was in my pants
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize