found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
