i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
