she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
