So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I'm both gender and math confused
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize