found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Randomize