fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
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