do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
