No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
