Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Randomize
