I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
