I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize