the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Someone came in the potted fern
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Randomize
