Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize