My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
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