i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize
