we have officially lost it.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
