But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
