2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
Welp...herpes.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
My bed smells like the plague
Randomize
