Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
