opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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