I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
