I want to make a zoo with you.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
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