I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
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