I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Randomize
