Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
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