My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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