On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
You need a sexual gate keeper
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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