she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Randomize
