we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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