You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Randomize
