I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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