I showed him my bush... on skype.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize