if only i could text you this smell
I wish i was in the wii world.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Randomize
