we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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