I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
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