wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
